Dressing Up for Life's Runway

“Fashion fades, only style remains the same.” – Coco Chanel

As long as I remember, I was always stylishly well-dressed. And, until I was about 12, for special occasions, my outfits had custom-designed hats. I owe this to my sister Jean, who worked at a high-end textile and tailoring shop in the heart of Colombo’s bustling metropole, known as Fort. At that time, Colombo’s Fort was in close proximity to Sri Lanka’s Parliament, Governor’s House (which became President’s House), all the major airline offices, banks as well as the most prestigious hotels and commercial establishments. It was at this shop that the crème-de-la-crème of high society shopped and had their clothes tailored by some of Colombo’s most sought after custom tailors. Fortunately for my sisters and me, Jean picked up some incredible deals on luxurious fabrics and learned intricate tips on sewing ladies dresses.

Being the youngest, and considerably younger than Jean, I looked forward to going with my mother to visit Jean. As I showcased my newly tailored outfits, I received gushing compliments from the elite clientele and store management while the tailors were impressed with Jean’s attention to detail. And Jean was pleased that although I was a tomboy at home, when I was all dressed up, I looked and acted like a lady and never ruined my clothes.

I was too young to understand what people meant when they said I had a great head for hats. I just felt elegant with the contraptions on my head so I walked confidently. To my dismay, I stopped getting my stylish hats when Leonard the hatmaker died suddenly. And, for reasons unknown to me, the store never replaced him. Beyond his craft, Leonard was also a very nice man and we had become family friends with everyone who worked with Jean. When he died, we mourned his loss as we would a family member.

As I developed into a teenager, inspired by some of the fashion magazines that my oldest sister Jan used to buy, I started sketching designs for my dresses, artfully executed by Jean. By then, I was becoming more involved in social activities, especially in church and in a culture where appearance mattered, Jean made sure that I was dressed to the hilt, often lending me her gold jewelry to complement my glamorous outfits at some very high profile social events.

When I was 18, I briefly worked for the United National Party, while they were in Opposition. At its first-ever Christmas party Jean proudly watched as I was chosen “Best Dressed Woman” by the future President of Sri Lanka, future minister of State and another prominent politician. With the cash award I received, I placed an order for a pair of shoes I designed.

During my seven-year tenure at Singapore Airlines, I was constantly complimented for my sense of style and my clothes. I remember the Ad Agency executive telling me on several occasions, “You must spend a fortune on your clothes.” Little did he know that, thanks to Jean, I spent nothing because she never charged for tailoring, nor did she charge me for the elaborate fabrics she bought at a significant discount from the store where she worked.
Jean never complained about staying up late into the night sewing an outfit that I could wear the next day for a special occasion. Those who hadn’t visited my home thought I was more affluent than I really was.

In the past 27 years I have lived in the U.S., I have continued my indulgence for fashion – with one exception. I have had to “spend a fortune.” But, I do it because I cannot bring myself to wear something that is ill fitting or with shoddy workmanship after I have had the privilege of wearing clothes that draped my figure well. And, because Jean raised me to be a fashionista, there are certain things that cannot be compromised.

"Fashion is a kind of communication. It's a language without words. A great hat speaks for itself." (author unknown)

A Fontaholic's Dilemma

More than 20 years ago, when I became immersed in marketing collateral design, I began an appreciation for fonts. Today, I confess I am somewhat of a fontaholic, obsessing about the use of fonts to the point of being distracted even while reading a restaurant menu. Sometimes, I can't choose my meal if there is a poor use of font and menu design.

I think back to the days before digital printing, when printing presses used dies. According to The History of Printing (www.printlocal.com), Johannes Gutenberg perfected the technology of movable type in 1458 to help printing press realize its full potential. Movable type – letters of the alphabet, numerals, and punctuation marks constructed of durable metal – could be assembled into a page of text, then disassembled and re-used to create a new page of text.

The article goes on to say that early printers needed both a printing press and a type font – the set of movable type – to produce books. Type was cast from molten metal poured into carved molds; the task of carving the molds was the done by typographers. (My 1981 wedding invitation was printed using two dies.) 


From the late 1600s to the late 1800s – the printing press and the science of typecutting had only minor refinements. Then in 1814, The Times of London introduced the first steam press to replaced hand-operated presses; in 1868 the rotary steam press was introduced. With that came the fonts as we know them today, starting with Times New Roman.


Planetoftheweb.com's "History of Typeography" notes that Claude Garamond from France was the first that developed the first true printing typeface not designed to imitate handwriting, but designed on rigid Geometric principles. Garamond also began the tradition of naming typefaces after the designer. Caslon, Baskerville, Bodoni, Goudy soon followed. In 1954, Max Miedinger, a Swiss artist created the most popular typeface of our time...Helvetica. The Swiss also championed the use of white space as a design element.


Fast forward to the modern era ... everyone with a computer has become a designer with access to so many fonts that come pre-installed with programs. Unfortunately, some misuse and abuse the fonts and make a mockery of good design.


In my opinion--which is commonly shared by graphic designers--a font says a lot about the published piece, regardless of the medium. It is like clothes that someone wears. Adobe Garamond and Gill Sans are two of my favorite fonts and they are often used by brands with sophisticated style. Sabon is another classy font used in corporate communication. Newspapers, magazines and practically every college paper uses Times New Roman. Trade Gothic is used in all classified ads and most forms of advertising. Where space is of the essence, Franklin Gothic is used. (source:  http://webrulon.com/30-awesome-fonts-that-all-designers-must-know-and-should-own/.)


So, when you are at a restaurant, after you have decided on your order, spend a little time checking out the fonts on the menu. See if you agree with the design and whether it helped you decide quickly or whether it distracted you because it was either hard to read or too cluttered. A badly designed menu may remind you of some garishly dressed person who caught your attention and you wondered, "Did that person look in the mirror before they left the house?"

The Fabric of our Lives

For my office holiday party this past December, I wore a black silk saree with Aishwarya Rai's face intricately woven with gold silk threads on the top and bottom border. She was also on the Pallu - the portion that drapes over the shoulder. The saree was iconic and so was Aishwarya Rai. Everybody noticed this.

Everyone takes photos these days with iPhones, Blackberries and a whole lot more. They got me, but they did not get the intricate details of Aishwarya on the saree. Apparently, the lighting and flash reflected against the gold threads and all that could be seen was a large nondescript design of black and gold.

Some of my friends and relatives recommended taking pictures of the saree with my webcam or placing it in sunlight or turning off the flash. I tried various techniques but wasn't able to get a decent picture showing the "pallu" and border, until my nephew from Australia visited us for Christmas. Johann Ponnampalam has a great eye for photography (a family talent that somehow eluded me)and was able to place me in the proper lighting path and use the right lens to vividly capture the delicate details and contrast of the black silk against the intricate design of Aishwarya's facial features.

I have always believed that our lives are a woven fabric of relationships. The designs range from simple to complex and can be two-toned, or multi-toned (or bari-toned) based on the nature of our relationships relative to the complexities of the individuals and situations. At first blush, it may sometimes be difficult to see the intricate design we weave because of dark times, distance or a reflection of our values, experiences, feelings.

However, with the love and patience of a trained eye, one can see the beauty and uniqueness of each relationship. It may not always be easy to replicate the same intertwining, but it is the careful weaver that watches the threads in the loom to be able to produce an amazing fabric that can be appreciated long after the weaver's work is done.

The Reluctant Love Affair

I generally like to plan my life. In 2004, I had two dogs - my 9-year old black German Shepherd, Pepper, whom we had raised since she was a puppy, and the Shiba Inu that my husband had rescued when it was a year old in 2003. I was not ready to take on another dog. But, Michael, my huisband was hell-bent on getting another German Shepherd to be his companion when he was away in Arizona, and had already paid the breeder a deposit. And so, in November 2004, I unwillingly accompanied him to have first pick of the new-born litter. The puppies were all so adorable, but I did not want to get involved in the decision. Michael picked the largest one, a rambunctius male with the longest hair, and named him Prince.

A few weeks later, the breeder shared with us the results of the personality test and warned us that while Prince was exceptionally smart, he was also apt to make his own decisions, thus making himn a bit of a problem to train. Prince had an enviable heritage --LAPD K--on one side and Search and Rescue on the other side. A day after bringing him home, I had reluctantly fallen madly in love with this adorable, loving ball of fluff with a mane that looked more like that of a lion cub than of a dog. And, every ounce of love that I have showered on him is returned at least three-fold from this now full-grown protective German Shepherd who is almost my height when he stands on his hind legs.

There is a striking parallel to my career as a marketer. When I was five, I had decided I was going to be a teacher like my aunt. My uninterested first students were my cat and dog and my nephews who were a couple of years younger than I. By age seven, realizing that I had not been able to teach this unruly bunch to read and write, I had decided I was going to be an actress and a writer because my father had introduced me to Shakespeare and the classics. Throughout school, I excelled in all the subjects, especially drama and writing, so I felt secure in my career choice until I turned 16. My mother drilled into my head that “good Catholic girls don’t become actresses.” So, it was decided that after High School I would go to Secretarial School like my sisters before me.

That is when fate intervened in the form of Daphne Lord, my Drama teacher who had seen my inherent talents since I was five. As she took me under her wing I got the opportunity to teach Drama to kindergartners through eighth graders while pursuing my degree in Drama and English. As a safety net and in deference to my mother’s wishes, I did complete my training at Secretarial school, which helped me land my first real job at Singapore Airlines as a secretary.

Just as I had reluctantly fallen in love with Prince, I soon was thrust into a future I hadn’t planned and into a tumultuous love affair with a career that has loved me back as intensely. Within a year, I was moving out of the secretarial duties at Singapore Airlines into customer service and Public Relations. I enjoyed a successful run during which I learned to develop strong media relationships and play a big role in managing the ad agency relationship portraying the Singapore Girl. Then I moved to the USA and secured a position at an ad agency where I learned the agency side of the business. This spring-boarded me into the marketing department at Security Pacific Bank (later acquired by Bank of America) where I learned targeted marketing, trade show and event planning, proposals and presentations, graphic design, collateral development and the print process.

Just when I thought I thought I had acquired and mastered the skills necessary to succeed in marketing, along came the World Wide Web and the endless possibilities of globalization and the need to have a web presence for customers to access at their convenience. Building on that, innovative companies like Apple and Verizon delivered smart phones demonstrating the importance of speed to market and faster analysis when dealing with a consumer that was “always on.” Social media has further empowered the consumer, changing marketing to an open conversation that anyone can participate in or observe.

Shakespeare said, “All the world’s a stage and men and women merely players. They have their exits and their entrances. And one man in his time plays many parts.” My early passion and talent for drama have served me well as I have learned to play many parts as a marketer – creative visionary, strategist, analyst, team leader, content provider, and most importantly, adapter and innovator.

The path of true love has never run smoothly as I have encountered companies and management that have been unwilling to spend their marketing budget when faced with uncertainty, not realizing that marketing is not an expense but rather the underpinning of a successful organization.

Although I didn’t plan or choose my marketing career path in my younger days, I have adapted well and ridden the waves of uncertainty and innovation, and enjoyed the adrenaline of success without going under. Looking back on a career that chose me as its almost reluctant partner, I am glad that I embraced it with all the passion it required. I am thankful that I did not stick to my original choices because my personality, talents and interests are all in harmony as I spend my days with my sole mate – the one love that has been as faithful to me as I have been to it.

Perhaps it is no coincidence that my reluctant love affairs have been with a dog named Prince and with a career that still gives me a “Royal Flush” in my cheeks each time I talk about it.

Time Travelling - Blame it on Saduk

Fall 2009 started like any other, except that my sister was coming to visit me for the first time in my 24 years in the US. Strangely, in October 2009, the stars may have been in some kind of alignment that took me back 24 years because around that time, I got a Facebook friend request from Amin Saduk, my colleague at Singapore Airlines from the early 1980s. And, so began, my Austin Powersesque time travel back to the eighties.

As my sister and I reminisced about old times, old friends, I mentioned that I would love to get back in touch with Rajpal Salgado, my former close friend from Singapore Airlines. My sister used to know Rajpal's uncle and his wife. My reminiscing must have sent telepathic signals around the world, because pretty soon, I was flooded with friend requests and Skype contacts from my SQ "family."

By accepting friend requests, I was also able to find others who also belonged to this "first work family" because Singapore Airlines was my first real job. I grew up a lot, learned through mistakes - my own and those of others. But, what I learned most of all, was the true gift of friendship and the distance friends would go for each other. My biggest mentor was Amal Fernando, but unfortunately, before I could re-establish contact, I learned that he had left Singapore Airlines and next thing I heard was that he had passed on. I was teleported to happier times when Amal was full of laughter and advice and took charge of any situation. Times when he went out of his way to help friends, acquaintances and even strangers without expecting anything in return. My memories became tinged with regret, tinged with joy that I had shared a friendship with a person of the caliber of Amal, who represented the best in all of us. As I smiled through my tears, I was glad that Michael and I had met him during my two visits back to Sri Lanka.

Singapore Airlines was my training ground - I joined as a single girl - an inexperienced hopeful who had not ventured beyond the shores of my birth land and had never stayed out a night without family. When I left Singapore Airlines, I was a graduate of life - a world traveler, a public speaker, someone who had handled the publicity for this airline in Colombo, a radio DJ, a television news anchor, a bride, a mother. Throughout my metamorphosis, I had my cheering squad of colleagues, who were sincere in their criticism and their praise. My deep friendships helped me become a confidante and a mentor as well. We had our differences like any "family" would - but our bonds were strong.

I did get back in touch with Rajpal, as well as Ricci, Dilanie, Dilli, Rajitha, Hafeez, Yasmin, Sharmala, Shiranka, Amal's son, Maya, Becky, Juthika, Deannath, Jaliya, Joan, Manju. Blame in on Saduk for starting this global outreach and trips down memory lane that forced me to dig up my archives of photos and memorabilia of those times, so our kids can either laugh or cry at those images.

We had some great parties! Celebrations of birthdays, weddings, farewells, holidays, awards, promotional events. We hobnobbed with Ministers, Reporters, Ambassadors, the Who's Who of the Travel Trade and Government Authorities and we danced till dawn. We even got involved in "Spread a Little Happiness" campaigns, giving underprivileged kids the times of their lives and attended funerals of family members as we helped each other cope with the loss of a loved one.

I've been doing a lot of time travel lately and am glad for those times that helped me become the woman I am today. And, as we are spread across the globe, we are bound by the Silver Kris that taught us the Pursuit of Excellence.

Ginger - The Versatile Root

Someone once asked me, if I were a spice, what would I be? Without hesitation I said, "Ginger." After all, originally native to South Asia, it is one of the most adaptable of all spices and can be used to flavor a variety of cuisines. Kinda like me - originally from South Asia, but adaptable to any environment.

To say I love ginger is an understatement. Reminds me of Bubba recounting to Forrest Gump all the ways you can eat shrimp. For instance, I like to add some ground ginger into my English Breakfast Tea (milk, sweetener included). Whenever I have a queasy feeling in my stomach, I always find relief by placing a slice of ginger under my tongue or chewing on a piece of candied ginger. Unless, I have some ginger beer at hand. Nothing helps congestion like some good old green tea with ginger and honey.

Over the past two decades, I have become an accomplished cook - in a variety of international cuisines. Interestingly, most recipes call for ginger! Who hasn't savored the pickled ginger that accompanies the most delectable Japanese dishes? And the obvious thin strips in many menu items in Vietnamese or Chinese restaurants? Don't get me started on Caribbean cuisine, oh my! Even, the revered French chefs use ginger in several recipes.

Sometimes, I channel my departed mother to cook up some aromatic Sri Lankan food of which ginger forms an important flavor base. Speaking of dear departed, my sister Jan used to make some of the wickedest ginger beer and ginger wine that she would dole out in rations when we visited her while she was alive. I was always one of the favored ones to get seconds.

According to Wikipedia, Ginger has a sialagogue action (stimulating the production of saliva). All this talk of ginger has made my mouth water. I am off to buy some ginger snaps.

P.S. Long live the Gingerbread Man and his gumdrop buttons who knows the Muffin Man who lives on Drewery Lane!

Calculating the "Love Quotient"

It is no secret that because humans are powered by emotion, most decisions are made on emotion and later rationalized with logic. As neurologist Donald Calne explains, “The essential difference between emotion and reason is that emotion leads to action while reason leads to conclusions.” Given that context, it is natural that everything we do involves relationships and how we feel towards that relationship. This explains our attraction to certain people who have a “personal magnetism” or “charisma” derived from the Greek “kharisma", meaning “divine gift.” The French call it "je ne sais quoi," or "I know not what." This characteristic is hard to define, but easily recognizable in people we like and admire.

Charismatic Leaders know how to connect with people. They take the time to scan and read their environment, and are adept at picking up the moods and concerns of individuals as well as larger audiences. They will then hone their words and actions to suit each situation. Charismatic Leaders pay a great deal of attention to the person they are talking to at any one time, making that person feel like he/she is the most important person in the world.

While many believe that charisma is an inherent trait, some people believe it can be cultivated. Here are ThinkSimpleNow's 8 Keys to Instant Charisma:
1. Mirroring the actions and expressions of the person you are talking to
2. Remembering Names
3. Being genuinely Interested in the person
4. Allowing Others to Talk
5. Having an Intention to get to know the other person
6. Offering Help
7. Smiling
8. Having Authenticity

In “IQ vs EQ” by Candy Tymson, she explains that recruitment specialists admit that the emotional competence (EQ) of the candidate is proving to be as important today as their intellectual competence (IQ). Out-of-control emotions can make smart people ineffective. Those candidates that have emotional competence are able to control and direct their emotions and feelings, without being so controlled that they stifle all feeling and spontaneity - and therefore any spontaneous behavior from those around them.

It is therefore natural that marketers are realizing that building loyalty for their brands involves developing a personal relationship with their audience. Joel Desgrippes of BrandImage explains it best. “Branding is not only about ubiquity, visibility, and functions; it is about bonding emotionally with people in their daily life. Only when a product or a service kindles an emotional dialogue with the consumer, can this product or service qualify to be a brand.”

There are four levels of customer engagement to strengthen the bond between a consumer and a brand:
1. Confidence in the brand’s promise
2. Belief in its integrity
3. Pride in being a customer
4. Passion for the brand
This is why social media is becoming front and center of an integrated marketing strategy.

The 10 Commandments to Understanding Social Media – Kyle Lacy (expanding on Marc Gobe’s book “Emotional Branding”)

1. Think of consumers as people
2. Create products as experiences
3. Convert honesty to trust
4. Change quality to preference
5. Shift notoriety to aspiration
6. Switch identity to personality
7. Revert function to feel
8. Propel ubiquity to presence
   
9. Make communication a dialog
10. Transform service into a relationship

While much has been talked about the Intelligence Quotient and the Emotional Quotient, having both in the right balance adds up to the Love Quotient (IQ + EQ = LQ). Just as individuals who have a high LQ have a loyal following, brands that do will have a loyal fan base that will help them grow exponentially. As history has shown us. it takes passionate grass roots movements to bring about revolutionary changes. It takes genuine interest to start a love fest.